Monday, May 22, 2017

Paid Sex Leave for Government Workers?

Recently a Swedish politician in northern Sweden, Per-Erik Muskos, proposed that local government employees receive an hour of paid sex leave per week.  This was promptly shot down by other members of the 31-member government council. Per-Erik's proposal was that this paid leave for sex would help counter Sweden's falling birth rate. When you consider that Overtornea, Sweden, the community in question, is located on the Arctic Circle, you would think that they already had reason enough for sex. Anyway, nice try, Per-Erik!

A lot of things come to mind with the practicality of this proposal being adapted by some American cities or counties. 

Obviously, one issue whether this hour of paid sex leave actually be used in copulatory activities; or will some irresponsible government workers actually spend the time drinking coffee, watching television, gardening, hiking, or eating Swedish meatballs? Will the government require some form of documentation: a signed affidavit, swearing under oath that they had sex, physical evidence, or so forth. Seriously, will this require something like testing or some other intrusive indignity? Will they be asked whether they experienced the big O or not?

Then, there is how government might define sex. Don't laugh. Will some Clintonian criterion define sex only in terms of actual intercourse; or would minor benefits* forms of sexual relations also count? If the justification for this fringe benefit is to increase the birth rate, then certainly this could be for this kind of restriction. Also, some diligent governmental statisticians will have to crunch, or at least massage, the data!

Given that a significant number of workers are unmarried, then a paid sex leave benefit could be seen by some as encouraging premarital sex! That would offend a number of people because of  moralistic issues! Indeed, some states decided to require that government workers get married before this benefit would be available to them. Or, if pregnancy resulted, can you say governmental-elicited shotgun weddings?

Anyway, the two major political parties had a lot to work out with this idea. Democrats were in favor of paid sex leave; but wanted to extend it to all workers, not just government employees. Capitalists were not keen on this, especially for fast food workers, who had to find other means of their employees getting screwed. Bible-Belt Republicans who officially adopted a moralistic stance were opposed; however, a number of them were won over when it was pointed out that they too were government employees and that there's nothing like a little roll in the hay to ease tensions after a long afternoon of sessions or committee meetings!  Also, a telling argument was that government employees canoodling were causing less mischief then as opposed to doing government work. Now that's a concept that anti-big government people can easily grasp!

But a significant attraction for most Democrats and those Republicans was that more government bureaucrats could be hired to deal with paperwork generated by this new governmental benefit. In triplicate, of course. And have the compensated employees give all the gory details! This is to ensure that no one given the paid leave was doing other things, like texting or reading comic books, instead of what they were paid to do!



Nothing more refreshing than a little sex on the taxpayer's dime!


*From the expression, friends with minor benefits.


18 comments:

John Hill said...

I can see problems if your significant other is not a government employee and is unavailable during the day for sex leave. Does it become a benefit that one must forfeit or do you hook up with a coworker in a similar situation?

Grand Crapaud said...

I can see us having a National Voyeurs' Corps!

Big Sky Heidi said...

Isn't that redundant for the Revenue Department? They screw people in so many ways.

Anonymous said...

That is a cheap shot. Are you some kind of Tea Party supporter?

Cloudia said...

massage, the data!


you are amazing!

Mike said...

"actually spend the time"

So visiting a sex dungeon might not count?

bakku-shan said...

More like feeling up the data!

Claudette said...

Would they still get paid if they are on birth control?

Gorilla Bananas said...

They'd have to provide video evidence that they were using the time for the correct purpose. And the videos could be sold to compensate their employers. This could definitely work!

Insane Penguin said...

I read about this in the NYT and it has some possibilities as a perk for workers. After all, treating them well makes for a happy, more productive labor force. Besides, they are voters!

Anonymous said...

Cute cartoon.

Duckbutt said...

The idea is not too far-fetched. Research has indicated that workers do respond positively to incentives with better morale and increased productivity. Maybe by framing it as family time or some innocuous label it could be sold better. But, for God's sake, just give it. Don't make people justify how they spent their time.

allenwoodhaven said...

Excellent! You did a very thorough analysis, raising important questions, aspects, and considerations. I'm not sure how many more humans we need though. The planet is getting crowded. I'll admit that most people wouldn't want to move to the arctic circle!

Miranda said...

A nooner makes for a relaxed afternoon.

eViL pOp TaRt said...

Thank you for your comments, friends!

Rick Forrestal said...

Let's hear it for nooners!

Bilbo said...

NOW you bring this up, after I've retired from government service!

Sinner Bob said...

Now that is an idea i can support!